Coaching is all about YOU!
Updated: Aug 21, 2022
In coaching its understood that every person is in a unique life, business and career situation, with their own unique goals and desires for change. Therefore, it stands to reason that every person brings to a coaching relationship their unique abilities, interests, desires and even unique habits.
Often, people speak in general terms and not necessarily say that they ‘need coaching’. People talk about areas that they would like to change in their lives, such as their career, their relationships, their income, their weight, their confidence, their sense of value, or simply change the way they feel. Full on life transformation is nearly always a distant thing; where their short and medium goals are really the only things in focus. At this initial stage, people speak in the broadest sense, not realising that their goals will change over time, as they learn more about themselves, more from the actions they take. Often, at this stage, many people do not know what they are capable of achieving or who they can grow to be.
It is only through talking to someone completely impartial, someone who will hold you to account for your thoughts and actions, and without judgement that what is truly important to you will be realised. Every person I work with are at a different stage in their lives and at different stages of personal development. This is why my approach to coaching is flexible, to remain unique and relevant to that specific coaching relationship. If this is the type of relationship you need in your life, please message at email@example.com .
Coaching is personal and therefore, those involved need to create a unique, empowered relationship that allows for change to happen. A coaching relationship will only work when coach and client are equal. Both have different roles, collaborating and working together for the benefit of the client and their future. In a coaching relationship rules and boundaries for the relationship are agreed. Equally, the coach and client give this unique relationship power and a chance to succeed.
In a coaching relationship, the coach brings commitment, skills and understanding for change, whereas the client will bring motivation and a desire for change. At its most basic level, a coaching relationship is an active, positive and effective conversation between coach and client. A coaching conversation has a clear and powerful agenda that is focussed on learning, change and growth. It’s about stimulating and being a catalyst for change in the client’s life, where positive action, commitment and accountability contribute to an agreed wider purpose.
Confidentiality is an attribute to building a successful coaching relationship.
Making change means disturbing the well-established way of living or order in a person’s life. Starting a coaching relationship can be deeply satisfying, exciting to embark on change even when it feels risky. Change by its very nature is unknown, even when everyone in your world is committed and supportive of the change. If you are prepared to make significant changes to your life, you have to risk talking openly with your coach. Courageous disclosure and honesty are crucial, as it leads to genuine discovery, a necessary component for action. Without the safety and reassurances that confidentiality provides, the coaching relationship will be tentative at best, where neither coach or client will be clear about what is unsaid. In addition, neither coach or client can be sure if the coaching relationship is creating the ‘right’ change.
It is important to say that all coaching services are bound by confidentiality.
Another attribute of the coaching relationship is trust.
A coaching relationship is built on the common understanding that people are naturally creative, resourceful, whole and are capable of making the right choices for themselves. Trust built in a coaching relationship, relies on both learning that the other can be counted on, that results can be delivered, and from a point of reliability. Equally, the success of a coaching relationship relies on the client believing that they have a person in their life who believes that they can do what they say that they can do. A person who believes that they can be the person they want to be.
In building trust, the coach is able to hold clients accountable for their actions, their futures and their promises, as a way of respecting the client’s vision and actions. This accountability is not about judgement and is more about learning and forward action. The coach’s skill is to allow the client to be vulnerable in a safe space enough to take risks and explore, giving the client space to be more courageous. The coach’s skill is to make space for the client to grow.
Openness and spaciousness
The third attribute of a coaching relationship is the coach’s skills in creating spaciousness during every session, within which the client can breathe, explore, experiment, visualise and strategise without limitation or fear. This is a place where clients can vent their anger, troubles, perceptions of injustice and view their regrets. This spaciousness is a place where a client’s failure is acknowledged as a means of learning and where rigid rules and beliefs are replaced with curiosity and creativity.
Spaciousness is a place where the client explores whilst the coach guides, inspires and empowers the client to move forward towards their goals and vision. The spaciousness in a coaching relationship means that clients have as many channels open for creative inspiration without being restricted or directed by the coach’s own ideas. This attribute of the coaching relationship enables the client to explore the widest range of possibilities, even those beyond their original scope.
Speaking the truth
The spaciousness that a coaching relationship creates also provides a place where truth can be told. Truth carries only learning, discovery and new insight. A coaching relationship can only lead to transformative change if truth is considered as an essential attribute to the coaching relationship. With this in mind, as the client shares their truths in a coaching relationship, the coach will equally highlight habitual patterns, stories and truths that are true outside the client’s own world.
Ultimately, coaching is not about what the coach delivers, its more about what the client can create as a result of the coaching relationship.
If you are ready to explore your future and create a coaching relationship please do reach out - firstname.lastname@example.org , today.